Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize