4 words: hood of his car
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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