C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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