I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
