It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
