My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize