So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize