She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
