Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
