butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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