Sacagawea was the original milf.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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