Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
you traded sex for a burrito?
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
