One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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