I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
So gin and wine won't be happening again
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
