Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize