i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
