I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize