Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I will be naked everywhere
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
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