bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
