There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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