My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
