she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
