I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize