Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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