I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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