I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
