Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
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