I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
