Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
