Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I need to calm my uterus...
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize