You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
