The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize