i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize