I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
