I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
