I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
