It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
