kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
