So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
