Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
