My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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