She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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