Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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