I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
