FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
