He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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