Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
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