YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
