that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
