I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
